Utter Wonder: The Idle Thoughts Of C. Monks

Whose Idea Was it To Hold a Beer Festival Near a Bear Cage Anyway?.

Posted 08/21/2007 08:27 AM by cmonks in In the News.

Oh dear god. Did I or did not tell Tommy to STAY AWAY FROM THE BEAR CAGE? You heard me, right? Did I say, "Go to the beer cage?" No I did not. I said, "Tommy, dude, STAY AWAY FROM THE BEAR CAGE."

So my hands are clean on this one. I don't feel guilty one bit. Yeah, okay, it was my cell phone in the bear cage. So what? The bear was just asking for me to throw it at him. Bears are uppity. Think they're so big with those claws and whatnot. They couldn't beat a rhino, though. Those things are bad ass.

This post is dedicated to tonic water.

Comments.

Things only a zookeeper from Serbia can say, "Only an idiot would jump into a bear cage." You can't get away with that type of slandering of the dead in the USA.

Posted by: Sharon at 08/21/2007 09:44 AM

Sorry, dude. A grizzly bear would totally kick a rhino's ass. It wouldn't even be close. You'd be like, "Oh, goody, a grizzly is fighting a rhino! Let's go watch!" And the next thing you know, the grizzly bear would be picking rhino meat out of his teeth with a rhino bone.

Posted by: simpleton01 at 08/21/2007 11:49 AM

Grizzly bear smizzly bear. A polar bear could kick ass on the rhino and grizzly, with one paw behind its back.

Posted by: Patti at 08/21/2007 02:30 PM

timothy treadwell is revered as a hero in serbia, so this sort of thing is actually very common place.

Posted by: michael Murray at 08/21/2007 05:07 PM

I'm with Simpleton, a grizz would totally smoke a rhino. Rhino's actually have weak hearts, so all you need to do is get it running and FLUMP, it keels over. Their weak hearts also keep them from liking Michael McDonald's music.

Posted by: Orb at 08/22/2007 09:29 AM

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